Honduras, como se extraño!

Well I have been back in the States for about 2 months now, and I don't think it would be an exaggeration to say that not a single day has passed where I haven't thought about Honduras. In fact, there are many days where I wish I was still there. For many reasons. For the love of an escuelita which felt like a family I was proud to be a part of, for all the smiling faces of the precious niños and niñas who will always be in my heart, for all the laughter shared with special new friends, for all the deep, heart-felt talks had with those same friends, for the love of a muchaco who has a big place in my heart and in my mind, who I wish could be a part of my life more instead of less, for the love of a new language that is way more fun to speak than English, and for the love of a culture and lifestyle that drew me in quicker than imaginable.

They weren't kidding when they talked about this whole "reimersion process" being way harder than the initial cultural shock. I feel very strange being in my own country; everday- things seem harder instead of easier, and I feel like I have new perpspectives on things that no one around me can understand. I find myself hoping I will get used to being here again, but then again, I don't want to do that at the expense of letting my memories from Honduras get farther away.

On the bright side, I have a flight booked to visit Honduras during my vacation at the end of this month! I'm aware that it may, in fact, just make things harder for me in terms of readjusting here, but since I have every intention of keeping my ties in Honduras, right now I am just extremely excited about my approaching visit.

Hoy soy un poco mas Hondureña

I think every day I'm becoming a little more Honduran. Yesterday, for instance, I drank from the community cup. This requires some explanation. In all schools here, and really any public place, there is a water jug with a cup on top. One cup. That everyone uses. Can you imagine? Usually I have a water bottle with me every day, but yesterday I forgot it...so I used the cup. Oddly, enough, I felt pretty good about it afterward. It was a big step for me. I think having a Honduran boyfriend (Marco Andres, se llama) is getting me more accustomed to the lifesyle here, and what it's actually like to be Honduran. For example, we never have actual plans. Everything always has a question mark at the end. If he says he'll be over at 4:00, I might consider calling to ask where he is around 6:00. He often has to leave suddenly during a visit and comes back later (who knows when), sometimes bringing along some friends when he returns. Patience is definitely a virtue here. And how does this whole dating process work in Juticalpa, you may wonder? What is there for us to do? Not much. Let's just say we got to that comfortable-sitting-around-doing-nothing-together stage real fast. But, as a result, we talk A LOT and so I feel like I know him pretty well already, which is a strange thing for me. Normally it takes a lot for me to really trust someone enough to open up to them. But he's extremely caring and curious about my life. He also is an open book and loves to talk, so it makes it easier.

Sometimes it is really amusing to me, to pause for a minute - like take a still-frame of whatever is happening at a particular moment - and just take note of how bizarre the whole situation is. Last week I did this when I was riding the school bus home, sandwiched between a 5th and a 3rd grader, playing "piedra, papel, tijeras" (rock, paper, scissors) with one kid, while simultaneously having my hair fondled by three 1st grade girls in the seat behind me whining "Que bonito su pelo! Darme lo...." And then yesterday I saw a man - I wish I had had my camera with me because he was just the perfect Olanchano - cowboy hat, no shoes, no teeth, and a pink tee shirt that said in English "pretty in pastel". It was priceless. There are lots of moments like that. Very amusing but also very special. Everything about my time here is special. It's kind of a hard thing to grasp sometimes.

Ahora quiero escribir en español por que lo enseñame que sé como decir bastante. Pero cuando hablo, y cuando escucho, pienso que no sé nada. Pero no tengo razon. He aprendido mucho. Bueno...es que no sé que debo hacer cuando regreso a Los Estados. Es la verdad que no estaba aca en Honduras por tan mucho tiempo, pero todavia creo que voy a sentir muy extraño cuando me voy. Y voy a extrañar bastante personas y cosas acerca de Honduras. Mi tiempo aca fue muy especial (y un poco demasiado rapido) y voy a recordar Honduras y todas las personas incredibles que he conocido y todas las cosas nuevas que he aprendido (la español tambien ojala) por siempre. Siempre siempre. Nunca voy a olvidar. Solo falta un poco mas que un mes hasta tengo que irme, y necesito usar mi tiempo en la mejor manera que yo puedo. Todavia hay muchas cosas que quiero hacer antes de el catorce de junio.

Todo Macizo

More time keeps passing between each entry. I guess I've just gotten into the swing of things, and life here is starting to feel normal, as if there is nothing strange or exciting to report on. This of course, isn't true; although I've gotten into a routine and every day may not seem like anything exciting is happening, each day I'm here is a blessing and I'm trying really hard to make use of that. It's hard because time is going by so quickly. I can't believe it's already the end of April. I literally feel like I blinked and the month of April passed. Up until very recently I have been, for the most part, looking forward to going home. Not to say that I haven't been enjoying my time here, but I've just been marking days off on my calender and thinking about how great it will feel to be home. But now, kind of suddenly, it's sinking in that I am going home very soon, and that I know I'm going to be very sad when I do. I love the people of Honduras, and I will truely miss the laid-back, happy, and caring nature of the people and lifestyle here. There were three reasons that called me to Honduras: the first being the desire to help these beautiful people that I have met and loved before, to somehow contribute to the great work that is being done here. the second reason is wanting to gain experience related to my major, my career, experience that I know will help me gain perspective in my studies. The third reason, is my desire for cultural immersion; to experience in actuality what it is like to live in a country very different from my own. All of these reasons I can say without hesitation I am fulfilling. But at different points so far I have felt one reason pulling stronger than the others. The first thing that was very clear to me, was the incredible experience I am gaining working with students, especially those with special needs. I know I will go home and be capable of doing and understanding things I never would have before. Then, as I got to know the kids better, the pull of my desire to help was at a high point. I got so involved in the students and the countless things I wanted to be able to do to help. Right now, I'm feeling the immersion starting to kick in. This week in particular I have felt really connected to some of the teachers at Nazareth; like they are really friends of mine, more than just people I like and respect. (Not to mention that as of recently tengo un amigo casi un novio que me gusta mucho y con quien paso bastante tiempo...)
Anyways, to sum up, everything is going really great right now. My experiences are turning out to be everything I hoped they would be. The countdown is on for returning to the States, when a strange mixture of happiness and sadness and all sorts of other feelings will take over.

Mis Vacaciones Divertidas

I got back from my adventure vacation almost 2 weeks ago, and immediately jumped right back to work. It was almost like I could have used a vacation from my vacation before starting back up again. It was really something...definitely not like any other vacation experience I've had. Here's the week in a nutshell: Jess and waited at the bus station in Juticalpa for a bus to Tegucigalpa for about an hour early Saturday morning. The ride to Tegus is about 3 1/2 hours. Then almost immediately we went to the bus station in Tegus and waited about 1 1/2 for a bus to San Pedro Sula. That ride took almost 5 hours total. The "budget" hotel we had booked we stayed in for about 15 minutes total. After determining that the ac we payed for in the room was blowing warm air, and that there were GINORMOUS cockroach antennae sticking out from the sink, wiggling around, we decided we couldn't stay there. So we moved up to a "midrange" hotel that was like a whole nother world. The next morning we went to the airport to pick up Jess's friend Lauren. Then we immediately went to the bus station to find a bus to Tela. We probably waited about 3 hours in line to actually get on the bus, in scorching heat, but once we did the ride was only about 1 1/2. In Tela we went on a fantastic tour that took us by boat to Punta Sal, a gorgeous beach where no one lives except a family in a hut that cooks for the tourists. There we took a mini hike and saw some howler monkeys and huge spiders and really neat flowers and trees. We did a little snorkeling, ate an entire fish (eye and all) and got majorly sunburned (but later tanned!) laying out on the beach. Later on that day we got on another bus - which we waited for on the side of the road at gas station - that took us to La Ceiba, the third largest city in Honduras, and the place to be during vacations. We enjoyed the night there, with places and events to choose from to occupy ourselves. The next day we took a scenic cab ride up the mountain and into Parque Pico Bonito. We stayed at an incredibly designed jungle lodge with a pool and hammocks and an outdoor shower made of stone and really fun hiking trails. Our second day there we went white water rafting, where our tour guide made fun of us for being so terrible (all in good fun). By the end of the river though we were pros, falling out of the raft at a much lower frequency. The next day we went all the way back to San Pedro Sula where we mostly chilled out for the next day and a half. The country sort of shuts down on Good Friday so we had to make sure we were back in San Pedro so Lauren could catch her flight home Saturday morning. Carlos and Colleen had met up with us in San Pedro and Carlos drove us to Puerto Cortes where we had a very different beach experience. Herds and herds of people everywhere, and hardly any actual beach area, mostly just a dock and water. We didn't stay very long before deciding to head over to Lago Yojoa where we had a cabin reserved for two nights. It was a very chill, peaceful place with lots of volunteers and back-packers. It was in the town the lake was in, Pina Blanca, that we had some adventures. Our second day there we set out in foot to do a little exploring, and to try to find somewhere to get a good view of the lake. We ended up taking a jalon (which essentially is hitch-hiking - you wave someone to pull over and hop in the back of their truck if they're going in the direction you want to go - but it's very common and safe here) into town, then a 13-year-old hoped out of van without a door which apparently was some type of bus service because he ushered us and other people in for 6 lmps each (about $0.33) and took us to the lake. The next day was even funnier transportation. We had to stand around on the road and guess which school bus to get on to take us to a town to wait for another school bus to take us to Tegus. These school buses are called "chicken buses" because quite literally you can take your chickens, or whatever else you have with you on them. We were on this bus, packed with people standing in the aisles the whole time, for about 2 1/2 hours I'd say. Colleen and I witnessed a little girl in the seat across from us puke in a bag and then just hold on to it till we got off. Quite the experience. Anyways it was a fabulous trip. And certainly cheap enough. Definitely not something I'm going to forget any time soon.

Updates! (no se como se dice en espanol)

Even though the celebration at Nazareth for the volunteer group was 2 weeks ago, I really should share a little about that experience, because it was such a great day. Mary Roy, the leader of the mission group that was here from my church has been coming now for 15 years(!) so they planned a party for her at Nazareth. All the teachers came as well as many of the students who had prepared some form of entertainment, a song, a dance etc. 3 of the older deaf girls performed a dance that I taught them, and they did a really good job. You wouldn't have guessed that they were deaf, or that they only learned it that week! After the performances we had a little dance party...so much fun. I mostly danced with Jose Carlos, whom if given the chance, I would absolutely try to take home with me in my suitcase. In addition to thoroughly enjoying the company of the kids, I also was having a great time with the teachers. Even though all the other Olancho Aid volunteers were there, not to mention 24 other Americans for me to talk with in a language I understand, I found myself hanging out with all the Honduran teachers, laughing and dancing and having a grand old time. I felt like I fit in with them, which is really a great thing, and not something I would have expected so soon.

This week I came to the realization that my time at Nazareth would probably be better spent working individually with the 5 Autistic kids. They are very difficult kids with basically no communication skills. Right now the school is really only serving as a day care for them, because they don't have the knowledge or resources to know how to work with them. I certainly don't either, but information is more easily accessible to me, and I figure any amount that I'm able to contribute will help in some way. I do enjoy teaching my clase de artistica, which I will continue to teach to the best of my ability, but it just feels less important to me.

Last night I went to Michael's house for a couple hours. Michael is a fourth grader at Santa Clara who is blind, and whom I offered to teach piano lessons to. He told me he had a keyboard at his house, but I did not assume he meant the little mini, almost toy keyboard that you can carry with one hand. None the less it went well, despite my zero experience in blind toy keyboard instruction. Michael was super excited when he learned to play Mary Had a Little Lamb, which was nice to see because he's usually very calm and quiet. I'm looking forward to teaching him more.

Monday night Colleen, Annie and I went to an exercise class. At first the only people there were us and 3 other gringa volunteers from the Day Star school. But eventually the Honduran women came, on Honduran time of course (always late). Now, I have taken my fair share of exercise classes, but I don't think I've ever enjoyed them as much as I did this one. There were so many great dance moves; we were shaking it all over the place, getting really sweaty and probably looking pretty dumb, but it was so fun! We're going to try to go every Monday and Friday.

Today was Dia del Padre (Father's Day) at the Santa Clara School. What do schools in the States normally do for Father's Day? Not much I don't think, maybe make cards for them? Well here it is a really big deal. We spent all morning setting up tents outside, putting tables under them and decorating them with tablecloths and party favors. A stage was built and decorated, food was delivered. All fathers came and had assigned seating, and each class prepared a song, dance, poem, or something else cute like that. Later we served lunch for all the dads. It was nice. The day seemed really long, and we were outside in the sun all day (I got my first significant sunburn of the trip) but all in all I think it went well.

The most exciting news is that I am now officially on vacation! Jess and I leave tomorrow for what I believe will be a really incredible week. Our first destination, after going to San Pedro Sula tomorrow to pick up Jess's friend at the airport, will be Tela, a town known for its beaches, where we will take a day-long boat tour (snorkeling included). Then we will bus it to La Ceiba for a night (a popular city near the beach with a great night life). From there it's a hop, skip, and a jump to Pico Bonito, a jungle known for it's large selection of outdoor activities. There we will stay 2 nights in an eco-friendly lodge and do another tour (hiking to a waterfall, maybe some white water rafting). Then we'll make the trek back to San Pedro Sula for the next couple nights, which is one of Honduras' 2 big cities. We will end the week with some descansar by spending 2 nights (including Easter) in a peaceful lodge by a lake. I'm so excited. Be prepared for a full detailed account when I come back, as well as hopefully some great pictures. And also prepare to be jealous. Where is the money for all this coming from you ask? The perks of traveling within a third world country.

Muchas Personnas, Muchos Lugares, y Muchas Cosas

It's been pretty eventful here ever since the group arrived on Thursday. If I'm not in la casa working or sleeping, then I've been with the group, taking advantage of being able to see my mom and also to get to go to some different towns nearby and meet some new people.
Saturday Jess and I went with the group to a church in a very small town nearby where they set up a clinic for the nurses on the team. It was pretty crazy and stressful for everyone, I think, but also very rewarding. There was a line of people waiting the whole time to complain of headaches, stomachaches, smelly ears, you name it. Anything to be given some medicina (i.e. tylenol or eye drops). It was kind of sad though, because all the people that came probably never get to see a doctor, and were just happy to get some attention. And there were at least a few people that probably needed some serious help, far beyond our capabilities, and therefore help that they most likely will not get. It was also pretty sad that where I was most needed was as a translator. Jess was the pick of choice, of course, and there were two other girls on the team that do pretty well with Spanish, but after them I was basically the go-to girl. It was really good practice for me, though.
Yesterday I went with the group to another small town nearby, near a river and over a somewhat crickety bridge. We just spent some time there entertaining the kids, and giving away things, and then we went to the house of a family with 3 deaf kids (which is why I wanted to go). When we got there I realized two of the three I knew already from Nazareth, Joel and Denis. But it was nice to get to see where they lived and practice my signing a little with them.
Today was a weird day at Nazareth, as so far they all have been, but I did get to start my clase de artistica. I made up a simple and fairly unimaginative dance to Stevie Wonder's Sir Duke, one which I thought would be simple enough for the really little kids and difficult enough for the older ones. I definitely overestimated the level of rhythmic capability of most of the children. There was really only one class of the four that I had today that were getting it, and that was the deaf kids! I'm going to have to do some modifying I think for the mas pequenos ninos. It will be easier to plan the more I get to know each child and their individual capabilities.
I guess that's all for now; expect a bunch of new pictures from this weekend soon!

Mi Madre Va a Venir!

I now somewhat officially know what my schedule will be like at Nazareth. And even though I really have no reason to be because my task at hand is certainly not an easy one, I find myself feeling quite relieved and much less stressed. Just knowing that there is a plan and sort of having an idea of what to expect each day makes a world of a difference. Up until this point I have been just showing up and wondering what I should be doing and in general feeling really awkward and out of place, which I suppose, does make some sense. So this is a good thing. However it brings me to my next challenge: if anyone has any ideas for teaching music, dance, and theater to special needs Spanish-speaking kids of all ages and abilities with basically no materials or anything to work off of, I'm open for suggestions! One thing I know for sure is that these kids are incredible and I am thrilled that I am going to get to know and work with every one of them.

Today was a very tiring day. For the first time I stayed for part of the afternoon session which is only the deaf classes, since I will be working with them as well. So basically I struggled (and I do mean struggled!) the whole day to communicate in two different languages, neither of which is mine. Even though I went home feeling exhausted, I also felt accomplished. I do believe that I'm learning more each day and more and more people are trying to communicate with me, which helps a lot. Last week I went and sat in the park for a little while and a man came and sat next to me and I somewhat carried on a conversation with him for a solid 10 minutes. He even told me that my Spanish was good! Needless to say it was an exciting event for me.

In other exciting news, I'm learning how to cook Honduran-style! Jess showed me how to make pupusas the other night (weird cheese called quesilla inside greasy delicious handmade corn tortillas) and they came out so good. And tonight we made baleadas which are flour torts with beans, queso, and mantequilla. Also very good.

The MOST exciting news is that my mom is coming tomorrow! :) She will be here for the next two weeks with a big group from church. She's going to love it I'm sure, and I'm so excited to show her around and get to hang out with her a little.